There are a lot of things that I like to do when I top. It gets me turned on to see someone kneel without asking, to push them up against a wall, to do some of the rougher type of play that can be fun and scary. A good caning is always great, too (which I’ll surely wax poetic on again very soon — a friend of mine has requested the cane tonight).
But I still rank spanking as one of my favorites, especially my bare hand against YOUR bare bottom. Why?
1. It’s intimate. My sub is across my lap and there’s a lot of contact over a lot of surface area. Even through clothes, you can still feel the warmth. And I have access to other body parts — the head, the neck, the back — for touching, scratching, stroking. The hair, if long enough, is accessible for pulling. Some people really like their hair being pulled roughly back while they’re getting spanked.
2. I can feel my sub’s breathing and the way he’s reacting. A lot of male subs, for reasons I haven’t fully determined, get very quiet during play. This is fine, but makes it occasionally hard to tell if I am going too far or not far enough. With OTK there’s often an intake of breath, that I wouldn’t notice if he were bent over a table or bench, that tells me I’m starting to get through to him.
3. Easy, quick “bondage.” I don’t usually tie someone down during a spanking, unless he’s really into that. But some spankees like to struggle. I can easily grab his right hand and pin it to the small of his back to help hold him in place. Or I can do a leg lock over one or both of his legs. A lot of subs have told me they love how helpless this makes them feel, which increases the experience for them.
4. I feel strong. There are some bottoms who need heavier implements. I simply won’t get through to them until I bring out the wood or the heavy leather strap. But with most, my hand is pretty effective and I can spank for a long time. The boys (and girls) seem to like it.
5. It is reminiscent of “Mom.” Sorry, but this is one of the realities of OTK, one of the reasons why people like it. It reminds them of what Mom (or Dad) used to do, or what they fantasized about a fantasy mom doing. I’m not a mom in real life. But I play a pretty good mom — mean and nasty when I want to be, but also caring and nurturing. Because we all know spankings are all about the love…