Cassandra Park

 I think I left the impression, when I wrote about FetFest a few days ago, that I didn’t connect with others much. I wanted to revise that a bit. There were more connections happening than I’d suggested, but most of them were of the “getting to know people a little better” nature.

I got to top SubMale9992003 (Bruce), whom I’ve known for years but never played with. I used his floggers, canes and other toys, which simplified things for me. I know his canes are the ones sold and used by Mistress Nona (Mistress Mine on FetLife, proprietor of the Iron Bell Academy). They’re good quality canes, and Bruce can take a pretty good thrashing, so we had fun. He’s expressed to me on several occasions that he can take it hard if the top builds up as she plays. So I tried to do that with him. I started light and sensual, then spanked him, then flogged him–going from soft to hard floggers–and finally I caned him.

He had cane lines on his butt already, so I assumed he’d played earlier in the weekend. But Bruce said they were lingering marks from a session with Mistress Nona a week or so prior. I was his first top of the weekend, and I felt good that we got to play. I really liked watching the series of parallel lines forming on his butt as I went along, and the low sounds he was making in response to the cane.

Bruce is smart and a really nice guy–an ex-Marine. My Dom and I shared most of our meals with him during FetFest. We see him often at Paddles and at parties in Long Island.

Over the weekend, I also had occasion to talk with and attend classes run by Jim Deuder, International Mr. Leather Bootblack 2011. I’ve known Jim casually for many years, he was friends with Master Blair when she used to live in the NY area. I knew her as Mistress Blair back then, and she gave me one of the hardest scenes I’ve taken to this day. Here is a pic from that day.

I think I feel a bit shy around “Leather People.” I never know if I fit in, if I am accepted as one of them — which may sound crazy, since I do plenty of fetish activities and I have a Dom. Yet, I’m not in any ritualized family structure and my public group activity is fun, party play. My “Leather Family” members are my Long Island friends and my spanking friends. Jim is queer, and I don’t always know if I’ll be accepted by those of that orientation.

But, Jim was nice–he always is. I don’t know the significance of Mr. International Bootblack, but he likes to polish boots and it’s got meaning to those whose boots are symbolic of their lifestyle. I’ve had my boots blacked–we did it at TES Fest–it feels good and you get shiny, new-looking boots as a result. At many fetish events, a boot-blacking station is set up to raise money for charity.

Beyond those connections, there were other people from NY that I got to talk to a little more, like Lolita Wolf, a BDSM educator who gives classes and works at Purple Passion.

Some of the FetFest connections remain anonymous. I did find a FetLife profile for the hot young thing I got to strap on Monday morning, but I’m hovering in the background for now. I am old enough to be her mom!

Overall I did have fun, even if the connections were brief. I can’t say anyone I met will go on to be my “next best BDSM friend” but that’s fine. I feel a part of this community and that’s good enough.

Slutty school girl is alive and well, and expected to be spotted this weekend at FetFest. I’ll get some pics of me wearing this new outfit very soon. I also have another very cute top that goes with it. All were found at Purple Passion.

Some have suggested that there is no need for clothes at a clothing-optional camping event. Yes, we can all run naked through the woods (pass the Deep Woods Off, please). There is certainly a time for letting everything hang out, and I’m all for that. (click on photo for sexy video).

But I like special dress-up clothes. Often you look sexier in clothes than out of them.

Speaking of slutty/sexy, some very interesting people have been writing to me about potential play, including a few newbies just prime for corruption. I cannot wait to meet them. Who knows what this weekend will hold?

Here’s a little more info about the upcoming TES Fest in New Jersey, and a reminder of my schedule:

• Book and DVD signing–Saturday, July 2, 1:30 p.m.
• Class–”Payback doesn’t have to be a bitch: Topping for Bottoms”: Monday, July 4, at noon.

Click on logo below to find out more:

TES Fest July 1-4, 2011:  40th Anniversary Celebration!

TES Fest is the annual gathering for the BDSM and sex-positive communities to celebrate the steps TES’s founding fathers took in 1971: the opportunity to find our freedom. Taking place over the Fourth of July weekend, TES Fest is the premiere event in the NYC Metro region for everyone (from amateurs to seasoned veterans) to socialize, learn new skills and simply have a great time. With classes and special events covering the gamut of topics and special interests, TES Fest allows people to explore, educate and entertain themselves in a healthy, safe and sane environment. This year’s event will take place July 1-4, 2011 at a 3.5-star hotel in Piscataway, New Jersey.

Visit www.tesfest.org for more information and to register!

It’s my birthday today, but last night I was invited to a small party to celebrate the 50th birthday of another NY spanko friend. As these evenings go, there were about two hours of talking and eating before any action took place. But eventually people started pairing off and heading down to the basement “dungeon,” where there was a whole array of toys and several pieces of equipment to use.

At one point the birthday girl was “ordered” to assume the position on a spanking bench and everyone (no pressure or anything, lol) took turns giving her 50 spanks. I happen to think the idea of the birthday spanking is kind of goofy but, as I recently posted on FetLife, I like the spankings and I certainly like the attention, so I’m not stopping anyone.

By the time midnight rolled around and the clock ticked over to MY birthday the party was winding down — therefore, I managed to escape a “round two” of birthday spankings. Rad did the honors this morning, spanking me 48 times plus one-to-grow-on, right in front of the living room window while our cat Pip stared at us in either disgust or disbelief. Or maybe he was just thinking about sushi.

Back to last night — I invited my musician friend C. to attend the party, as I was hoping to introduce him to some of my other friends. He’s a switch, but as I’ve reported here before, he’s also an insatiable pain slut. He’s a great guy and I love “punishing” him. And he can REALLY take it. My friend M., another switch, agreed to help me double-team him. I’d never seen her top before and I was quite impressed. C. was also impressed, and we worked him over for probably close to an hour. Lots and lots of cane strokes, a bath brushing, a strapping and a little touch of bastinado — the cane and a light paddle to the bottom of his feet (quite enjoyable, as we finally got an “ow” out of our stoic friend).

The night before, I was called upon to wield the cane on another friend. He said he’d felt the cane before, but hadn’t had a “serious” caning. Like C., I knew this man could take it because I’ve topped him before.

So I picked out four canes with different diameters, started with the thinnest and worked my way up. At one point I shifted gears, pulled out a very thin, whippy cane and gave him 12 fast strokes with that before continuing with the thicker cane. I heard his “oohs” and was happy to see I was making an impression. He received 60 strokes altogether; 12 with each cane.

I like when people ask me to introduce them to the cane. It can be a very intimidating toy, and does have a scary history (Singapore comes to mind). But the canes typically used in S&M play can be easier to take than a bath brush, or even some hair brushes, in my opinion.

(Cross-posted from Sandy’s Room)

Mmmmm. I smell debauchery!

Check out my updated “where I’ll be” listings, at right. If you’re going to any of these events and we haven’t met yet, let me know (respond to my blog here, message me on FetLife, send an email to mscassandrapark@gmail.com, or just come say hello at the event itself.)

Tomorrow, Friday, I plan on staying in and maybe even getting to bed at a reasonable hour; I have vanilla activities during the day on Saturday and then I’ll be heading over to “Metamorphosis,” a party hosted by the group “Suburban Kink LI.”
“This is an anything goes play party. If you can dream it, you can do it,” the hosts declared on FetLife. “Who are we to say what’s consensual between two adults?”

Now, my own limits hold me back from engaging in all-out debauchery, but I have no rule that I can’t watch! (How does “all-out debauchery” differ from “run-of-the-mill debauchery”? –talk amongst yourselves.)

Suburban Kink is also organizing a spa day/after party the morning after the Metamorphis party, but I don’t think I’ll have the energy — plus I usually have coffee on Sunday mornings with a vanilla friend.

Calendar is rapidly filling up. I was invited to a kinky 50th birthday party a week from Saturday, which meant cancelling a date with vanilla friends to go sing karaoke–much to my immense relief. Humiliation play, anyone? In two weeks we’ll be traveling to Massachusetts, then Long Island Leather N Roses Iron Bell party is on the 25th … yes, it’s June 2 and already every Saturday night is booked. I still have two Fridays open.

Reminder about contacting me: Please email mscassandrapark@gmail.com if you want to book play. I do not answer unscheduled phone calls; I check messages and respond as soon as possible. But I prefer email.